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Wednesday, July 29, 2009

The Great Dog Food Heist

Having been a pet owner for eons, I came to the conclusion several years ago that most of the veterinary practice is a sham. Yes, a sham! Okay, I've said it. Slam me, if you like, but I won't change my opinion. Veterinary medicine almost killed my Yorkie seven years ago after having been a very healthy pup. It was only after I took him off all their shots and pills that his health began coming back. It's been seven years now since I've taken him to a vet and he's thriving.

Alright, the rant is over and now we'll be moving on to the topic of this post which is dog food. During Simon's (our Yorkie) sickly years, he was put on a special diet of Eukanuba's Fish and Potatoes. Of course, since the veterinary practice is a sham (I won't apologize anymore for this attitude), this special dog food can only be purchased from a vet, along with a healthy price tag. Not only does one have to go to a vet's office to buy this hard food, but you can only go to YOUR vet, or they won't sell it to you (unless, of course, you bring your pet in for a check-up first). Now, I'd like to hear one good reason why pet food needs a prescription that only YOUR vet can prescribe? Sorry, but without it, it can't be sold to you. I'm waiting.......

Now....onto the great heist. Soon after we purchased our weekend getaway, when our packing routine wasn't down pat, we realized on the OTHER side of Atlanta that we had forgotten to pack Simon's special "FP" food (fish & potatoes). OH SH*T!! We were going to be away for 3 days. He'll starve. So, this bright idea popped into my head....we'll stop at one of those large pet stores (I'm not going to mention which one, for obvious reasons) and tell them of our dilemma. No way could they refuse our unhealthy pup of his special diet for so many days.

Picture this:

Me: (In a panic) Please help! We're on vacation and we have no food for our little sickly pup who needs FP!

Pet store: Well, the vet has gone for the day.

Me: Certainly, there must be something you can do!

Pet store: Let me check......sorry, the register has been closed down for the night.

Me: Can I give you cash?

Pet store: Oh no...we couldn't accept that.

Me: I NEED FOOD!!

Pet store: (Realizing I'm not going to leave without "FP") Okay, I'll give you a few plastic bags to get you through the weekend. Let me go get the bags.

Me: Thank you, thank you, thank you!!

Pet store: Here you go. (She hands me 3 small empty plastic bags)

Me: Huh???

Pet store: I'm outta here, go grab yourself some (as she scurries away).

Okay, I'm now left alone in the back of the store, where their vet clinic is located, in a darkened corner (she had turned the lights off as she left). My heart starts pounding. I'm in a frenzy....do I? I ask myself. What would any mother do for her sickly child? So, I quickly search the dim room for the "FP" and all I could find was one of those HUGE 50 lb. bags. Have you ever tried to rip one of those open? Not easy. But, the adrenaline was rushing. Unfortunately, it wasn't a clean tear. The bag ripped wide open and dog food fell out all over the floor. 50 lbs. of it. I began scooping up handfuls and throwing them into the bags. Thank goodness it was winter and I had my puffy ski jacket on. I stuffed the bags inside my coat and began to scurry off when who appears, but Mr. YnB and Simon. (they had been waiting out in the car) I brushed past him with fear in my face as I whispered "Go, go, go".

It wasn't until we were back on the highway that I told him the story. I kept turning backwards checking for blue lights....but none ever appeared. Whew....my only heist ever and it was for dog food.

29 comments:

bearmancartoons said...

Great...the person who works the next day will think one of the animals got loose.

yorksnbeans said...

I never thought of that. I always thought they would come to the conclusion they had a human thief in their store.

morethananelectrician said...

Maybe you should have grabbed a couple of rawhide chews and a squeak toy too...

yorksnbeans said...

Welcome MTAE! I felt more than enough guilt just from the food!

Andy Holroyd said...

As another long time pet owner (cats for me) I've always found my local vets to be very skilled and caring. But very, very expensive.

Over the years, with different animals, I've had to pay for:

many neuterings
a broken leg
a leg lacerated by barbed wire
a grass-snake bite (we think), not toxic but caused a massive infection
a crushed paw (traffic accident?)
an abscessed tooth
various cysts and growths, and the usual - ear mites, sheep ticks, roundworm, tapeworm and goodness knows what else.

It's an expensive passion, keeping pets.

Love the dog food story. Here in the UK I've only ever seen Eukanuba for sale in the vet's surgery. But it's very rare for me to go into a pet shop so I don't know if they are allowed to sell it too. My cats just get regular biscuits from the local shop, it costs about 30p a day to feed two.

delicate flower said...

Wild story, but your parental/protective urges kicked in. And, the clerk was really being rather helpful, albeit in an odd way.
There'll no doubt be a front page story tomorrow: pet store robbed by mysterious hairy yet healthy creature.. his only bit of telltale evidence was teethmarks on ripped bag of high-end dog food.. DNA results expected soon.

Similar story for me just this morning at the pharmacy.. prescription ran out YESTERDAY! so, he faxed request to Dr and then handed me 2 pills!!!
some people can be pretty nice...

yorksnbeans said...

Andy...Oh, they are caring!! Too much so! Animals don't need to be pampered as much as humans do. They have a natural defense system that doesn't require half of what humans like to inject them with.

DF...That was nice of him/her. I had a similar experience with a very caring pharmacist one time and a couple of months later she was killed by her crazy x-boyfriend (who had originally met her at the pharmacy!).

Julie said...

A dog food thief, and a body part thief ..... I'm getting worried about you YnB!! (Actually I would have found a couple more bags, and loaded some more dog food - that stuff is pretty darn expensive!!) I estimate that our pet food bill in this house costs more than our own food!

P.S. I've sent you my body part!

yorksnbeans said...

You're right...it is sounding like I'm into thievery. :)

As far as the expense of dog food goes, we only have a little 8 lb. Yorkie, so even though we call him a piglet from time to time, he can't really eat us out of house and home!

Thanks for your part!!;-)

George said...

Perhaps you should have invited your husband to come in and help you carry the enitre 50 lb bag.

Don't we sound just terrible? :)

yorksnbeans said...

I'm beginning not to feel so bad after some of these comments! :-)

Sweats Model said...

This happens to be 1 of my pet peeves (no pun intended).

It's food, for crying out loud. The process requiring a prescription (which is what it is, if you have to pay the vet for a checkup first) for DOG food, puts me in a sputtering, arm-waving frenzy. Something I should probably look into getting a prescription for...

p.s. I order full-strength Frontline Plus online from an outfit in Australia with no prescription.

nonnie9999 said...

i never heard of having to have a vet's approval to buy food. my sweet puppy (may she rest in peace) was allergic to everything--chicken, fish, pork, etc. i had to buy her the dog food made of lamb and rice. i could get it at the vet's office, but i found a pet store close to where i live where they sold it cheaper. i did learn that, with a doggie who is sensitive to a lot of foods, baby food is always an option. it's good when they aren't feeling well, too.

yorksnbeans said...

Nons...how long ago was that? Sorry to hear about your pup. How old was he/she? What breed?

yorksnbeans said...

Sweats....I think the major culprit in my pup's health issues stemmed from "Sentinel" the monthly heartworm and flea control pill.

Joanna Jenkins said...

"I'm outta here, go grab yourself some."
What a hoot!
xo

yorksnbeans said...

JJ...can you imagine the look of horror when she handed me those empty bags!! :-)

Don Mills said...

I always suspected you were a dangerous criminal at heart!

But not as criminal as the damned vets. My little weinerdog has gotten into all kinds of mischief and everytime I take him to the vet they manage to convince me that a battery of tests have to be run.

The only results I've ever gotten back show up on my credit card.

Don

yorksnbeans said...

Don...Exactly! I know some people who will take their pets to the vet if they sneeze! How ridiculous is that? The vets just rake in the money.

clairecollins said...

Bean, what a wicked wicked yorkie mommie! Okay, you know you aren't. Puppy had to eat. You tried to do it the right way. The clerk gave you the bags and told you to go to it. I understand though. I would have felt guilty too.

yorksnbeans said...

Hey, the clerk told me to, so I was just obeying the order!! :-)

NobblySan said...

Feel guilty? Nah...not me.

I'd have shoved a 50Lb 9or 20Kg over here) bag on each shoulder and legged it for the door.

OK... OK... shuffled, panting and cursing towards the door.

nursemyra said...

hey YnB - glad you received my little parcel. I'm still getting bouncebacks when I email you.

enjoy the weekend

nonnie9999 said...

ynb,
i can't talk too much about her, because i start crying and can't stop. she'll be gone 6 years on november 5th, and i still can't get over her not being here. she was part lab and part whippet and named pipsqueak, pippy for short. she was 15 years old when she left me. she was a puppy for the first 14 years, and everyone who met her loved her. i'll miss her every day for the rest of my life.

yorksnbeans said...

I can just imagine. I am so close to Simon, I don't even want to think about that part of it. He makes us laugh EVERY single day and brings us so much love and joy. I never knew I could be so close to an animal. I had a cat before him and I loved her, but nothing like Simon. Hugs to you!! (( 0 ))

blunt delivery said...

see? now who said that puffer jackets were a superfluous pleasure?

so, so useful in a sticky situation

yorksnbeans said...

when I read "sticky" situation, the first thought was "eeewww"! :-)

Hey, send me a body part, BD!!

Geonite said...

The only time I take a pet to the vet is when they are sick, shots for the kittens and to be spayed/neutered.

And my pets see the vet more often than I see the doctor.

Medicine is a sham. We are being stuffed with expensive unnecessary drugs when all we need to do is eat a healthy diet and exercise.

yorksnbeans said...

AMEN!!